What “sanctity of marriage” means
“Sanctity” means that something is regarded as holy or set apart. When Christians speak of the sanctity of marriage, they usually mean that marriage is more than a private arrangement or a contract: it is a relationship that God honors and that couples are called to treat with seriousness. The Bible does not use the phrase itself, so the idea is drawn from several passages. Christian traditions agree on many points and differ on others, and this article tries to note both.
Marriage at creation
The foundation text is Genesis 2. God observes that it is not good for the man to be alone (Genesis 2:18), and the passage concludes that a man leaves his father and mother, is joined to his wife, and they become “one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). Many readers see three ideas here: leaving (a new household), joining (a committed bond), and becoming one (a deep union).
What Jesus said
When asked about divorce, Jesus returned to creation. He quoted Genesis and concluded, “What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder” (Matthew 19:6, KJV; see also Mark 10:9). For many Christians this is the clearest statement that marriage is intended to be lasting.
Marriage as covenant
The Bible frequently describes marriage with covenant language. Malachi 2:14 refers to a wife as a companion and “the wife of thy covenant” (KJV). The prophets also use marriage as a picture of God’s faithful love for his people; the book of Hosea does so most vividly. A covenant is a promise-based relationship, not merely a feeling. That is why many wedding vows speak of staying together in good times and bad.
Honor and faithfulness
Hebrews 13:4 says marriage should be held in honor by all and the marriage bed kept undefiled, and that God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers. Proverbs 5 encourages faithfulness and delight in one’s spouse. Jesus also spoke about the heart, not only outward acts (Matthew 5:27-28). For a pastoral look at what happens after a breach of faithfulness, see Bible verses about forgiveness of adultery.
Marriage and Christ and the church
Ephesians 5:21-33 connects marriage to the relationship between Christ and the church, calling it a profound mystery (Ephesians 5:32). Husbands are told to love their wives as Christ loved the church, and wives are told to respect their husbands. Christians interpret the passage’s call to submission differently: some read it as a distinct leadership role for the husband, while others emphasize the mutual submission of verse 21. Our articles on what the Bible says about a wife and good husband Bible verses explore these roles further.
Where Christians differ
Without trying to resolve these, it is fair to say that thoughtful believers differ on:
- The definition of marriage. Many traditions teach that marriage is between one man and one woman, and point to Genesis 2 and Matthew 19. Others hold different views. Churches and denominations speak for themselves on this, and readers can consult their own tradition.
- Divorce and remarriage. Jesus’ words in Matthew 5:32 and 19:9 and Paul’s in 1 Corinthians 7:10-16 are read in various ways. Some traditions allow remarriage in limited circumstances; others are more restrictive; others are more permissive.
- Polygamy in the Old Testament. Figures such as Jacob and David had multiple wives, and the narratives often show painful consequences. Most Christians read these as descriptions of what happened, not as ideals.
Married in God’s eyes but not legally?
A common question is whether a couple can be married “in the eyes of God” without a legal marriage. Christians answer differently. Some stress that the Bible shows marriage as a public, witnessed commitment, with family and community involved, and that Romans 13 encourages respect for lawful authority. Others emphasize the sincerity of the covenant. Legal recognition varies by country and has practical consequences, such as inheritance and parental rights. This site cannot give legal advice. A pastor and a qualified legal professional in your area can help with specific situations.
Married couples in the Bible
- Adam and Eve (Genesis 2-4)
- Abraham and Sarah (Genesis 12-23)
- Isaac and Rebekah (Genesis 24-27)
- Jacob, Leah and Rachel (Genesis 29-35)
- Elkanah and Hannah (1 Samuel 1)
- Boaz and Ruth (Ruth 4; Ruth’s devotion is explored in Bible stories about loyalty)
- Hosea and Gomer (Hosea 1-3)
- Zechariah and Elizabeth (Luke 1)
- Joseph and Mary (Matthew 1; Luke 2)
- Aquila and Priscilla (Acts 18; Romans 16:3-4)
Some are examples of faithful partnership. Others show struggle, favoritism or failure. The Bible does not present these marriages as flawless.
Safety and hard situations
Calling marriage sacred does not mean that anyone should remain in danger. If a spouse is being abused or threatened, safety comes first. Please contact local emergency services or a domestic violence helpline in your area, and consider speaking with a trusted pastor or counselor who understands abuse. Scripture’s emphasis on honoring marriage should not be used to pressure someone to endure harm.
Healthy marriages also benefit from support. Couples who are struggling can speak to a pastor or a licensed marriage counselor. For how marriage fits into the wider household, see the importance of family unity in the Bible.
Questions for reflection
- What does it mean to treat a promise as sacred?
- How do Genesis 2 and Matthew 19 shape your view of marriage?
- What helps a couple stay faithful in daily life?
- How should a church community support marriages without placing blame?